Tree of Snakes -- The Crown Jewel of Columbus

How exactly is someone knighted in Columbus? If there is such a process I’m sure it involves drum sticks and PBR swill, lots more kneeling and a lot less swordplay and royalty. Once someone figures that out, I’m thinking the first Sir, would be Sir Jeff Fernengel. While we’re at it, we should probably knight all members of the Tree of Snakes – Anderson included. Though the drummer was missing last Saturday night (replaced by Dave “Sugar Bear” Treneff), the Snakes showed why, even in this reunion configuration, are an asset to the Columbus music community. We had our own Ramones when they played the circuit, now we have nothing close. Again, the slump is upon us. When searching for bands to fill an early July show, I’m tapped for suggestions. There are the usual suspects – but nothing new. Cruise through the latest “alt” weaklies for coverage on our local scene (and while I can’t complain all that much about the national coverage) and you’ll see that those “writers” have absolutely nothing to work with. Local mercy applause – fluff pieces. Super Desserts notwithstanding, but they aren’t exactly fit for late night debauchery, not quite “rock.”

At least, if the Snakes were still around, they would be a go-to band to fill a party bus, soundtrack a barbecue, weddings and birthday parties. We would look forward to the fortnight regularity of seeing Fern and his buds get “dicey” with the Beverly Hills Cop theme, tell jokes about the Browns, and retard the imagination with colorful stories of alligator dentists and trusty swordfish. This “reunion” at the Carabar last weekend was so enjoyable -- it was if it was choreographed the night before. They even had their own Flavor Flav in the form of JDub, prancing about in his underwear. The hits just kept on coming and new songs (which I imagine you can see on the reg with Fern acoustically) poured out as easy as the swill was handed out before the set. Never have a watched a band have so much fun on the stage, that fun just oozes over, perma-smile all the while. So I’m not sure where this post will take us? To beg for them to return? To beg CDR to beg the Snakes to release another record? Hell, I’m tempted to organize a Kickstarter to get the Ottoman Empire Strikes Back pressed on vinyl. Would you donate?