Burger Tour 2012: O'Reilly's Pub

O'Reilly's Pub

2822 N. High St. 

Columbus, OH 43202

(9.4)

O’Reilly’s has been a fixture in the Clintonville/North Campus for many years (just how many I can’t seem to find anywhere on the ‘net) and I’ve always loved the place just because it exists. I’ve been there a number of times in the last decade, but for some reason have never tried the food. It’s truly one of a kind, and the last of a dying breed of perfectly comfortable dive bars. They have a quaint sunken bar, a stacked jukebox, free Galaga, a lively patio, colorful regulars (including the guy I call “teach” cause he looks as if he did his first shot before the last school bell), and as far as I can tell it’s the closest thing to a Cincinnati Reds-friendly establishment as I can find (tell me if I’m wrong). 

I’ve always wondered why the barkeeps push the menu on you even if you’re just having a cheap draft during happy hour. Now, after trying a handful of Pepper Burgers over the last few months, I know why. I’m not entirely sure what makes the Pepper Burger so good – maybe it’s the attention to the cheese, the pre-grill recipe, the bun, the just-right size of the patty – but it has quickly surpassed any other burger I’ve had in this city (yes, it’s heads and shoulders above the mighty Thurman). There are a lot of pub-style burgers that boast some kind of quirk (i.e. the Gahanna Grille's Beanie Burger includes slaw) and in most instances those quirks need to be perfected to make or break the burger. Hearing about the Pepper Burger, I'd always imagined that the pepper might just be too much -- but that's far from the truth. The "pepper" of the Pepper Burger adds a satisfying crispness to this sandwich, they use a modest amount of spice in the pre-grilling stages that will never overwhelm the taste of the quality beef used here. And the toppings on the Pepper are not used to mask any inadequacies, they are there to compliment an already formidable burger. There's the standard LTO dressing, pickle chips, both provolone and pepperjack cheese (perhaps this is what makes the burger?), and a small portion of bacon. 

All told -- by reading here you'll find that that in the most unassuming locations, you'll likely find the best food. The Pepper Burger, which must have an origin story that needs to be told, is simple and common in it's creation, but a symphony of flavors when tried. Easily the best burger in this city. And though it doesn't rank as high as Crabill's or the Wagon, it sits high in the hierarchy of the Ohio burger.

Knockin' on Kevin's Door

I'm writing this in shaming myself for not going to "take-in" the new incarnation of Pink Reason for the third time last night. My mistake, but it was a school night. Still, what's become of Kevin Failure and Pink Reason is inspiring -- word of mouth reviews compares the new band to the Stones (I feel it can be achieved). And now, Mr. Failure lives right around the corner -- so seeing his constant shifts in full sight is something the denizens should not take for granted. One of those shifts is going from the moody immersion of his long players to the out-there concepts of his singles. The next chapter, or better yet footnote as chapters are heavier, is the Negative Guest List Jukebox Single recently released on Disordered. My review will sum up my agreeable thoughts on this anomaly. Anomaly, because the first side is chopped and screwed by Matt Horseshit and himself, giving the increasingly bizarre influence of dub more weight in today's world. Don't doubt out a whole album of this remixology. It's the b-side though that stuns. Failure and band's turn on Dylan is a stroke of genius because it fits Failure's strengths as an artist and performer like an airtight bio-hazard glove. Spooky in the recording's capture of such a pure moment. Find this. Wish I could post it here. For now, what I'm convinced is perhaps the 21st century's finest punk take:

Not a Mount Carmel Apologist....?

You should apologize if you've ever made a Blues Hammer reference in reference to Columbus' Mount Carmel. I'm guilty, hope I am forgiven. Seems I've caught some flack for my Agit-Review of Real Women. But I really like it. And with temps in the 70s today, it's the perfect soundtrack. So I suppose I'm not going to apologize again. Maybe it's age. Guess I just have to recline and get used to the kids questioning my tastes. This one is pure rock though. Watch below, ignore the douche headbands.


 

2011: Columbus' Stellar Year

Yeah. It's cool. I'll always play the "homer" card and rep Columbus above all other "scenes" in America and the world. If you were to never leave the I-270 corridor, you could still grow up hep, maybe even more hip than if you left and abandoned your roots in some soul-less megalopolis. Don't change. Stay here. Plant the seeds and keep watching them grow. This is simply a list of notable records that came solely from this city. Oldies, newbies, and for the most part, great peoples. I could probably name another 5 releases that pricked up my ears this year -- but this is the best of the best. Go buy, go listen.

Psychedelic Horseshit - Laced (Fatcat) 

>>>> Wrote some words on this here. <<<<

Envelope and Jacoti Sommes - This Could Go Either Way EP

>>>> Wrote some words on the record here. <<<<

Psandwich - Northren Psych (CDR)

>>>> Tempted to call them the best live band in town right now. This could've gone either way as well, but it turned out to be the psych garage record of the year, packed with everything that has put Columbus' brand of outsider punk and loaded with new dimensions Ron House sounds spryly surprised to encounter. <<<<

Moon High - Six Suns (self-released)

>>>> Seems this town is rancid with Appalachian art/alt-folk bands -- it's hard to keep them apart. Burn the violins I say. Moon High might get lost in some of those affectations, but keep it quaint and deceptively stoned enough to feel the songs. Good songs, that's all that matter .<<<<

EYE - Center of the Sun (self-released)

>>>>Wrote some words here. Rumor has it, Center of the Sun is soon to be released (on vinyl) on a reputable national label. <<<<

Cheater Slicks - Gutteral: Live 2010 (CDR)

>>>> Wow. The Slicks are more productive now than then and that's indicative of how much they are coveted by the cognoscenti of high/low art in Columbus. Australians would travel to Bourbon St. just to see this once, we get them once a month. Appreciate every moment. <<<<

Times New Viking - Dancer Equired (Merge)

>>>> I have nothing to say. I've said enough. In a lot of ways, TNV are done shouting, now reflecting, and soon to build a whole new temple to barbed pop and guitars. This is a nice breath before moving on.Their most realized record to date. <<<<

The Lindsay - Deep in the Queue (Anyway)

>>>> Mr. John Olexovitch would probably hate me if I called the Lindsay the Smashing Pumpkins of the Columbus family. Well they are. Olexovitch is nothing like Billy Corgan, but this band's riffs mirror those of alternative nation -- and that in itself is an alternative to what goes on in the dives. Every time they play, they explore, and what they do sonically gets bigger and bigger.Stadium rock for the thinking man on a budget.<<<<

Another Unnecessary Unholy Two Gif

If you're in one of the many scenes holding benefit concerts for the Letha Melchior Rodman Cancer Fund, you should probably go (as well as buy as much Dan Melchior music and art as you can) -- as it may just result in a historic occasion. Alright, so maybe history wasn't made, but in this young year, and in a Columbus that can't seem to rouse itself out of a winter mentality (even when there isn't a winter), it was quite a magical night. The call to help the Melchiors was first made by El Jesus De Magico (read my recent interview with the band here), who decided to "reunite" or simply jam for the cause -- then came the call for support. I'm not going to go into details, but between Psandwich, a seemingly reinvigorated Guinea Worms, a transcendent voyage from El Jesus, and a nihilist (not to mention sonically controversial) nightcap from the Unholy Two, it was the finest Friday of music I've seen in this city in quite some time. Of course, these are all bands/dudes/friends I've believed in for years, but for some reason this gathering went above and beyond.

 Don't believe me? Thanks to the thankless efforts of Mr. Sperry you can find all of that night's sets right here. I suggest listening to that January 27th in full -- to get the full effect. Keep it up Columbus.

We Interrupt this Blog...for some Unholy Two GIFS

This was taken at the first annual MegaCity Music Marathon back in September. Unholy Two destroyed that night. (hint, hint -- mark your calendars for next year's Marathon -- Saturday, June 9th). Now is a long time from then, so I'm taking this opporutnity -- and giving you a double shot of the UH2 -- to let you know to expect some (more) regular posts aboard here. Lots of fall/winter goodies in store. 

Nudge Squidfish Television

Some people in the Harrisburgh Players universe has been very busy lately, accumulating deteriorated VHS cassettes and other decaying media in hopes of preserving it for future generations to "learn" about "what went on." Of course, most of us, who did not survive among the time of the True Believers, have very little visual evidence of these times and their creative tidal-wave -- that's not to say we can't leave it to our imagination through oral legends passed down and those recordings -- and the stuff Nudge Squidfish has posted in a short time onto the mercurial channels of YOUTUBE (SUBSCRIBE) is filled with footage most of us will have never known existed. Among the multiple UFO sightings are music videos from Tommy Jay and Mike Rep, hour-long documentaries on Jim Shepard, full live shows, obscure audio from JayFish and Nudge himself uploaded over some pretty head-shaking imagery. Start watching, and start digging that rabbit hole you're about to retreat into.

Apparently the resurrection and revival of all this is to be celebrated in a much bigger project which you'll hopefully be seeing in an art museum/lonely basement somewhere soon.



Until then....."Tuff Luck Roy" courtesy of Tommy Jay...

The New Psychedelic Horseshit (For Now)

In the midst of recording and creating and spanning time -- Matt Horseshit has recruited a new member, who Wednesday night was responsible for manning strangled guitars, rhythm guitars, and Casio-control. When the three of them all lurch over their stations, it gets incredibly real. I think Matt was just trying his best to top the transcendent Gang Gang Dance show from the night before. "It's a competition." This is likely the line-up you'll see when the band hits the road with a brief stint with the Swirlies.

Married Life Quarterly - The "Music" Edition

Married Life isn't as much one of the Midwest's most informative underground 'zines, as it is more a diary of Mark Van Fleet's (and his wife Jen's) frequent home improvements. At least that's how each issue starts. Maybe with some jokes, some illustrations, then it move onto the meat. Regular column's like Van Fleet's reviews after a visit to the Columbus Public Library's vast CD collection, or bands commenting on every member who has retired from said band (the Psychedelic Horsehit issue is a keeper) or commenting on said band's entire discography.

It's probably apt to mention that Mark twilights in Sword Heaven and Providien (among other musical endeavors). I highly recommend picking up a copy of Followed By a Wraith.

But back to Married Life -- it only gets better - this quarter's issue includes a recording direct from a tape Van Fleet found in a Washington Beach dumstper. It's been lovingly named Washington Beach Blues by those who have heard it. Compltely anonymous and brimming with the type of music you might consider from Jim Shepard's neighbors (two doors down/underground) -- it's a rarefied release you can only get with the actual 'zine. You can read all of the content here. but to get the physical disc, you'll probably have to beg to the address below:

Married Life Quarterly
607 Midgard Rd. Columbus, Ohio 43202.

Obligatory Psychedelic Horseshit Announcement

Never understood why I sold my 2XLP of Agaetis Byrjun. I knew I would need it in reference one day. That day has come. Psychedelic Horseshit have signed to the venerable Fatcat Records UK. I've heard Laced -- and I can attest the superlatives I've given it (Kid A done by the Bomb Squad) are warranted. Matt Horseshit toiled away, cutting reel after reel after reel. Remixing and re-ducking back in the his perpetual drug den for inspiration -- paranoia taking hold only to increase the beats, the supersonic sound-collage, and the tender-loving, two-shy-of-"pretty," moments towards the spacey climax of this record. I'm thinking they've been blackballed by P4K, and ignored by Hipster Runoff (Matt Horseshit was Carles before Carles), because if any of these outlets had preview of Laced, it wouldn't matter if Psychedelic Horseshit dissed Ryan Schreiber's mother. As much as I enjoy Odd Future and the immense hype-load they've produced, Laced is something that could truly change perspectives.

Here's the official press release (via FatCat):

"Formed in Columbus, Ohio, in 2005, Psychedelic Horseshit were astoundingly prolific for their first five years, releasing cassettes, CDRs, and 7” singles on their own and on a variety of labels, with their debut full-length Magic Flowers Droned appearing in 2007. Their aesthetic at the time – which Vice described as “the most heart-poundingly great racket since that My Bloody Valentine covers record Comets On Fire never made”, and the London Times called “the sound of an angry Mark E Smith stripping wallpaper with a distortion pedal” – comprised a chaotic cocktail of protest folk, barbed garage punk, scrawny white dub, free noise, tin-can electronica, and shoegaze.

Forming a dense collage of trashed tones and in-the-red mixes, veering between challenging and genuinely catchy, and generally resembling the addled states of a full-blown drink and drug binge, Psychedelic Horseshit have been variously compared to The Fall, The Dead C, early Pavement, Royal Trux, Guided By Voices, Swell Maps, Sebadoh, Harry Pussy and Magik Markers, and located alongside the messy amp-blown brilliance of contemporaries The Hospitals, Tyvek, Eat Skull, and Sic Alps. Keeping a step ahead of the lo-fi scene they christened “shitgaze”, they've drawn on a broad range of influences instead of the xeroxed anorexia of many of their peers, have ruffled feathers by critically speaking out, and carved out caustic, humorous social commentary through snarky wordplay and witty titles.

Currently existing as the duo of Matt Horseshit (vocals/ guitars/ drum programming/ harmonica/ keyboards) and Ryan Jewell (drums/ percussion/ keyboards), Laced also features a guest appearance by Times New Viking's Beth Murphy, who sings on “Dead On Arrival”. Laced was recorded in Columbus throughout 2010 (with two tracks dating back to the previous year), in a variety of basements, practice spaces, living rooms, and bathrooms using almost no amplifiers and a beat-up 70's Teac reel-to-reel. No longer solely mining corrosive, lo-fi dysfunctionality in two-minute adrenaline hits, Laced is the first record that finds Psychedelic Horseshit consistently stretching things out and breaking new ground: losing the caked-in distortion and aggression, while retaining a drugged density and adventurousness, it is cleaner and far more electronic than previous efforts.

Sections of Jewell’s drumming are chopped, sampled, and re-sequenced, piling up rhythms and loops; the emphasis on rhythm and a spiraling mass of processed tones and melodies makes Laced, at timesx feel like a very fried, psychedelic dance record. Squelchy, fluid, and immersive, its huge blown-out swathes of blissfully reverberant FX, buried voices, smeared electronics, and melted-out guitar processing complement moments of blissed-out frequency mess to recall the most sublime moments of Growing or, alternately, Astral Social Club; there are shimmering loop-sections, places where the whole buckles in on itself.

At the center of the slurred, swirling chaos is Matt Horseshit’s gnarly, nasal vocal. In his words, Laced “has a vague concept about dreams and the hollowness of words…vibes of disdain for the music scene that's unfolded over the course of the last few years, and trying not to get crushed under waves of imposed identity in a sea of garbage. It's about experimenting, and win or fail getting back up to do it all again cause safe was never fun in the first place… The references that seem like drug references usually aren't, just like “I Hate The Beach” isn't really about the beach... I think the record is really about smokescreens and the interzone of a reality where everything is connected and simultaneously completely disconnected at once...and dealing with finding your face after its been pounded to a bloody pulp by digital pixel fragments. Or something like that.”

The Death of Lo-Fi and How to Survive It...

Like a three-headed Tom Cruise, it appears the kids are making all the right moves when it comes to the approach to their first Merge release (coming in April, watch out). It's rare to hear or read, for that matter, even a ephemeral quip from Mr. Jared Phillips -- guess i's because he "never gets asked to." All budding journalists, if you can provoke from him something as funny as this essay Phillips wrote for Vice UK, regarding the boom and death of lo-fi you'll be sitting on comic gold. Being Vice, they prompted him to "slog" on other bands (which from their perspective should be like shooting "dead rats" in a toothpaste tube) -- but Phillips is classy. That doesn't stop the comments from backlashing, proclaiming inferior bands like Wavves, No Age, and Best Coast the absolute in current indie rock. If only those comments were as funny and biting as Phillip's take on all of this. A must read.

Jewell of the Columbus Nile

If you've been reading the Agit-Reader lately, you'd know it's been hard for me to leave the 1-270 corridor in search of new invigorating music. Though the scene here is as dead as it's been in years, the usual suspects have made use going even further underground away from all the Daniels and "Great News"-influenced vanilla poisoning our city streets and the few clubs we have here (just wait, in a few months the revival shall begin, like it's 2008 all over again). One of those constant journeyman, and forward thinking-folk is Ryan Jewell - a guy I've always known as incredible but never as crazed as on his very first record, Eschew Obfuscation. Above is a video of what you're likely to see from the mostly percussive musician in the live setting -- as he's usually collaborating and/or playing a one-hour acoustic drone at an undisclosed location. Though the clip in no way resembles what you're about to endure on the record. Which you can buy here.

I Saw Wooden Shjips

Dear Diary,

I know it's late on a Monday night, but I had to go see Wooden Shjips. I saw Wooden Shjips. I love Wooden Shjips. I often say things when I'm "out of mind" like "The Wooden Shjips are America's best psychedelic band" -- cuz they are, and there aren't many truly psychedelic bands anymore in America. Even fewer purely psychedelic bands in Columbus.

They played in CDR's basement. This was the perfect setting. It sounded amazing. But it should. They record a lot of amazing sounding records down there. I hope they burn me a copy of the show. They were recording it. I hope they make a vinyls of the show. They were recording it.

They also recorded the set by Times New Viking. Beer was a $1 and shots were only $2. Not a lot of "columbus" people were there. I've seen the TNV many o' time and I can't honestly say they've ever sounded better than that night. It's nothing "talking," it's not kool aid.

Pretty sure Matt Horseshit played too. Broken-hand blues, by himself, and it was equally as magical. Though the up-lights were on, and those few people were shufflin' in, so you couldn't really concentrate on what he wuz trying to do by him lonesome. I really loved it. It felt like an amazing night then.

I had to leave early Wooden Shjips. Your light show was boss. I wish they'd hung up blacklight posters (no I'm serious). But no one knew, and Columbus did you lousy (don't worry, they don't understand). Come back, and we'll put it in the same place, with the same people, and they'll probably record it again (but I'd love two live Wooden Shjips albums recorded in Columbus), and if it's the same intimate crowd it will persevere, but if we convince 100 more people to come (cause your the best psychedelic band in America) then it will transcend a happening. That's what this felt like. Achieved the mission. A happening. Just wish a lot more people came under the same spell.

Good night.

Jeni's Sweet Corn and Black Raspberries

In writing this, I promised myself not to turn this blog into a foodie column as I already have enough...ahem...on my plate beyond W.O.W. Plus, the ongoing Chili Quest is enough eating to last a thousand summers. But, I wanted to expound the virtue of a food staple that has become a Columbus institution -- Jeni's Ice Creams. See, I grew up in an Ice Cream Family, with freezer always filled with Friendly's half-gallons and sundae cups spilling out of the basement unit. We were ever loyal to my father's brand, but ever since his departure from the company many years back we've been allowed to experiment past the Friendly's counter.

Jeni's signature flavor has always been Salty Caramel. It's a flavor that I actually crave. I'll drive miles to hit up a Jeni's just for a scoop, even in the middle of winter. I thought it was a flavor that couldn't possibly be topped -- that is until this summer. I must admit, the seasonal harvest blend of Ohio Sweet Corn and Fresh Black Raspberries (with a breath of honey and sea salt) might be the most incredible ice cream flavor ever concocted. It's honestly hard for me to explain here in words. The description claims it's trying to achieve "the essence of summer in Ohio" and I'd have to say that's fairly apt. Corn as an ice cream flavor might sound somewhat oft-putting to most, but my palette can assure you, don't be frightened -- it works. A pint of this will certainly be on my list of "things that made the summer of 2010 endless."

Reflections on the Parking Lot Blowout 2010

(photos courtesy of Matt Slaybaugh)

It’s hard for me to say what hasn’t already been said about the 5th annual Columbus Music Co-Op's Parking Lot Blowout. This is a glorious event, at which I had the pleasure of volunteering this year. If the Comfest Gestapo were in attendance they have learned a thing or two about how to plan a party. Perched right next to the Surly Girl Saloon, the PLBO is essentially placed upon an alley that doesn’t seem like it should be able to accommodate such an event. At times last Saturday, when that alley brimmed to capacity, doubled with the blaring July heat, it was a struggle to get a good view of what was going on up front. Sound issues were also apparent – but I couldn’t tell since I’d never seen the Gibson Bros. before. The communal vibes alone were enough to discard complaints about such things. To me, what the Gibson Bros. were doing was reflective of the entire day/crowd, and that was having a sloppy good time. Ripping through bluesy psychedelia with little regard to coherence and form, the Gibson Bros. emanated yet another ray of Columbus nostalgia too important to ignore. I imagine this is exactly what is was like back in the day, the only difference being Jeffrey Evans would stand and strut the way Jon Spencer does now.

This weekend I learned to truly love and respect the New Bomb Turks with all my heart. If there was a preference when I was younger, it was for Gaunt, and the Turks were merely the other punk band in town – with a few good records. Over time, ‘cause you know it heals everything, I’ve grown to love just about everything the Turks have done (except for those album covers, woof). The two shows I had the pleasure of partaking Friday and Saturday, just secured my adoration. Of course it was the weekend of Eric Davidson’s newly minted genre – “gunk punk” – and as forefathers to that movement the Turks displayed the tenets of “gunk punk” in a fiercely destructive whiplash over a two day span. Destroy Oh-Boy!! Isn’t that right? Not sure if it’s Sam Brown that truly makes them tick these days, but NBT have gotten better in the time being away – managing to keep the vitriol and goofiness intact, while blending in a hidden nuance and refinement that can only come when punks start manning day jobs. Davidson doesn’t look a day past 27 and his antics remain as obvious and endearing as ever. And in the folds of a NBT reunion, there was enough Gaunt love (killing myself for missing Necropolis’ doing Sob Story front to back) in these rooms to feel that spirit rise up as well.

What I did get to see up close and personal were sets from the newly formed EYE and the reunionized duo, Fat Girls by the Snack Table. Back in the day when sets by the Fat Girls were commonplace I can say with absolute dismay that I never got to witness one. I’m kicking myself in regret – as it sounds like Gretchen Tepper and cohort (apologies for not knowing your name) took Kim Deal’s wing to the Pixies and turned it into a rec-room full of broken down synths and ham-fisted riffs. Hilarious that Tepper, a raging NBA fanatic (a shot for Manute Bol?), dedicated most of the set to dissing LeWrong instead of ex-boyfriends and healthy lifestyles that normally inhabit the songs. To say that the Fat Girls were ahead of their time back in their day is an understatement – this stuff dwarfs any of the Le Tigre electro-schlock with a looming shadow of melody and welcome discomfort. To see them re-living re-making the model of songs past was just as entertaining as the blips and beats beckoning the crowd to get closer and quiver along with them.

EYE on the other hand, is the future – and gives credence to my theory that the Columbus metal freaks constantly evolve into hybrid monsters eclipsing their previous bands output. EYE consists of two parts Pretty Weapons and one thundering monolith from Teeth of the Hydra et al (goodness, can we get a Lack retrospective together next year? an LP re-ish?). A recent run-in with an ex-pat metal overlord, who was in town just to catch a canceled Pentagram show, was perhaps a omen as to what to expect from EYE, as their slogging, throbbing, pulse was like molasses dripping from the hash pipe. This was Pentagram on 33 1/3 if you ask me, usually vocodered out into darkened hills and valleys, worshiping the night sky and abandoning the stars. While not knowing much of their material (I was an EYE virgin, mind you) I found it easy to keep up. The undulating swing between pure doom drone and sick little hints of prog had me thinking King Crimson at their most sinister and Sleep at their most distracted. Translated that means this stuff is potent. I need to see this in a cramped, sweaty, dimly lit club sometime soon. Vinyl please – soon.



Yup. I booked it during Scrawl. Just never explored them all that much. And after a night and a full day’s worth of music, I was too cooked to make it to the Oblivions. So, I’ll keep it at that. Everything else (from my beer pouring shift, to the other volunteers I was fortunate enough to work with, and even the Late Night Slice sauces) was absolutely kosher beyond compare. Though I’m gearing up for the CDR BBQ (coming soon), I’d likely be happy if this was the end to my summer – but alas, this summer is endless.

In Studio A With Times New Viking

Not much to really report here. Just show you some pretty pictures of my favorite band recording in a "real" studio. I only say "real" because previously recordings have occurred in living rooms and basements, but this as-of-yet-untitled fifth LP from Times New Viking, has now been recorded at Mus-I-Col Studios ("A" specifically) where they have a control deck and separator rooms, full pianos and headphones that play in stereo and mono. "Real" living if you ask me. On this night they were mixing with Proglegs (he being Dusty of Moons) and Adam Smith (he being Adam Smith of CDR, Necropolis, and the Unholy 2, and best ear in town). What I heard, and now have been hearing all day, sounds like their masterpiece -- the one where everything falls into place. This should hit your ears sometime in 2011 -- from whom and by whom is still up in the air. So stay tuned. You get a sneak preview in the clip below. Thee Romantic Nihilist Album.

Comfest 2010 : A Violin Too Far...

While I'm surprised that I'm pretty much in agreement with my nemesis/colleague Chris Deville and his assessment of this year's Comfest, I'm not surprised by the absolute lack of creativity found on my lackadaisical Saturday on the grounds. I was already a bit nonplussed by the Entertainment Committee's being strong-armed by the law, the Comfest mafia, the community surrounding Goodale Park, to cut-back hours significantly, therefore cutting 30 odd bands in the process, but once I looked over the line-up, I was even more bewildered. This was not Columbus' brightest being represented. There were some ringers, but it was mostly glad-handing to bands that have been playing the same tired sets for years and a few newer "fresher" faces who had no business being there even if they are tearing up the Peach District.

Quite honestly, and I say this with the straightest face I can, the Shazzbots early Saturday morning set, packed to the gills with the hardcore under-10 set, was the closest thing I saw to originality in my entire day. Maybe childrens' indie-rock is where it's at -- you get to dress up in wacky outfits, take on new personas, use props, act a fool, and write excellent songs about numbers, bugs, and cats named peanut butter. Please go check out this video for "Everybody's Talking 'Bout 5" to see what I'm saying. And bonus, your fans have to be escorted by mom or dad, so that's double the audience. At 10 a.m. the Shazzbots had a bigger crowd than any band I've ever watched played the Treehouse. From what I can gather the 'bots are made up of an imploded Poophouse Reilly -- a band I frequently smirked at despite having the absolute worst name in Columbus music history, but are now tearing up the Wiggle's circuit looking to make inroads with Yo Gabba Gabba. I'd really like to get them in a dive bar at midnight -- just to show the jaded what it means to have a good time on stage. (If you're reading this Shazzbots, I'm serious, seriously).



Shazzbots serve as a nice segue into Super Desserts, since they of the kinder-core, have actually blossomed somewhat into a full-blown orchestra. On this sunny afternoon they required nth number of members up on the Bozo stage to translate the whimsically sharpened melodies found on new album Twee As Folk. Like it was stated in that Alive article, the Desserts taste best in small echo-plexed rooms, but I was amazed at what they accomplished so far away from the intimacy of five-feet of audience. They couldn't use their indoor voices this day, so it had to be epic. Right?

From there, especially during my shift on the off-ramp stage, it went completely downhill. One violin after another after another. Now -- the Super Desserts are completely exempt here because they are an orchestra of sorts, and what they do is mainly of the acoustic variety, rarely, if ever amplified, even through a PA, but there is no need for violins in rock music (I wouldn't call the Black Swans "rock" so don't get all bunched up kids). But what I saw were bands influenced by -- I don't know??? -- Sufjan Stevens, the Decemberists, Bon Iver (heard a Bon Iver cover btw, gross!!), Grandaddy. Goodness, this went on for four to five hours. Monolithic Cloud Parade, Historians, Old Worlds, Trains Across the Sea -- it was like a Paste Magazine come to life before my eyes. None of this was original or creative or hopeful or hummable or catchy or memorable. Fuck...it was sickening the amount of skinny jeans and goofy hats accompanied those violins up on stage. I did see some "property of Ohio State University music program" stands back stage, so maybe that explains all of the sheet music, but it's no excuse for the awful tastes these kids have. We have done the next generation a disservice, and I'm not exactly sure how it got to this, but we need to really step it up thirty-somethings.

The next act -- Wild Goose Creative -- was neither a band nor a collective, it was two overly cherubic hustlas who were neither "wild" nor "creative." What the audience was subject to hear was a diatribe about why "they" deserved to have time on the "entertainment" stages that weekend. They constructed a solar-powered jukebox? Couldn't that have been spoken on the "solar" stage? Then came the Peach Tree District's vaudeville/improv bullshit, which included a failed flash-mod, bad hipster-mocking comedy, and bland karaoke -- followed directly by soft-shoe Joe and the Trains Across the Sea with a rousing rendition of the Wonder Years theme song. Are you kidding me? While I'm all in favor of these non-profit organizations (of which I don't think the Peach Tree kids are one?) organizing and doing deeds for the whole, this stage was meant for "rock" and there were two hours of suck in place of that "rock" this year. And while I know the hours put in by the Comfest entertainment committee, and applaud them for the gargantuan task of booking and slotting all of these bands (not to mention putting up with all the bitching), I do think this year's slight could have been alleviated if they just went out and asked the "best" bands to play. There's a huge list of artists who could have done this -- just saying. Where the fuck was Envelope? He's like the de facto mayor of this city.



All I saw after that debacle that was worth writing home about was Flu Faker. Full disclosure - friends of mine - but about the noisiest and most original act that graced that stage all weekend. Alas, I didn't see Descendre or Shin Tower Music or 13 yr-old folk phenom Rain, but I did get to hear more than my share of shitty covers. And I'll be there next year, so, step it up community.

Comfest 2010 - Nothing to Get Hung About....

Expect a full report of my Saturday at Comfest, sometime early next week. I don't want to get into the problems with Comfest because then I'll just sound like a jaded cynic who is well past his prime (that I am, but oh well) and I know a lot of hardworking people that make this magic happen every year, for them we should be grateful. But yeah, some serious problems this year. Let's just say I'm only psyched to see three bands this weekend -- Flu Faker (above), Shin Tower Music (my pick from last year) and the Shazzbots (below). Maybe I'll find a new love (doubtful). Happy Comfest.

TNV/CAVE/PHS

BIG SHOW MONDAY. Yes, it's a Monday but Cave is in town. I just reviewed their latest EP, Pure Moods and was pleasantly stoned immaculate. Psychedelic bliss -- fer sure.

Go to Minimum Tillage Farming

......Collect Booty of Local Treasures.

As a member of the Local Music Community, I feel I have a comfortable grasp of the last fifteen years of so of Columbus Music History. It takes up a lot of space in my basement, a lot of time in my conversations, and a lot of my hard-earned cash. Yet, at the same time, I know absolutely nothing. I have absolutely nothing. I depend on guys like the dude who runs the currently brilliant Minimum Tillage Farming blog to keep me afloat on all that I have missed through those years. Sure there's stuff I could care less about, but it's a history lesson, and a scouring of his vaults, posting up every tape and single he feels worthy of a second life. Pictured above is the latest offering -- a tape by Skull Bank (released by Mike Rep's Old Age/No Age), who is from what I can gather, another off-shoot for the late Jim Shepard during his prime. Essential stuff the "forever lowman" can't touch. Equally intriguing is the mixtape made by Shep that came previously. Put this blog in your reader -- pronto.